I need a drink!

Okay so this week has just been full of surprises for me, aside from the fact that they have all been very good, they have all been very confusing. I really wish I could go into the details here and just let it all out but some of my "prizes" per say have this web address and well I'm just to chicken to admit what I have to say. FOR FEAR OF REJECTION! Yes the everyday, common, for lack of a better excuse "fear of rejection". I know females are supposed to be more influential figures in today's world, and I know that I have been a very independent woman since moving to Austin 4 yrs & 2 mths (glorious may I add) ago, but that fear of striking out leaves me sitting here at work wondering if I really want to take on what I have or may have coming to me or live the safe life that I had already intended for myself. Give it I have many pros & cons to what may push or pull my decision one way or the other, but there is one that is just unbelievably... Resilient, for lack of a better word, reason to stay with the safe life. AAAHHH but let us not forget on the other hand there is only 1, let me say that again 1 (ONE, UNO, SOLO), good reason for me to break or overpowers my first reason but this reason I jus don't see happening within the next year and if it does, well... That's just to damn quick. So I'm cast under this burden of future or present, of now or never, or to say EASY OR UNPREDICTABILITY. Yes I know that you do not know what I am talking about, but when it comes to matters of life, heart, future, and all that other stuff it's difficult for me to speak the specifics. And it is exactly because of THE LACK OF A BETTER EXCUSE of FEAR OF REJECTION that I can not say what is my burden. But to let you know that one road will take me to a simple life and the other will take me to a life of unpredictability I'm sure you can manage to figure out to what extent this choice will do to my life. So if you have a comment LEAVE IT!!!! Good or bad, I CAN TAKE IT STRAIGHT trust me ;)

Always
PurpleFuel